Fiction

Fiction by Wright Forbucks

Greed is good!

W4$ 2014 Goal: AM/FM Radio. Status = MET!

W4$ 2014 Goal: AM/FM Radio. Status = MET!

Hi all. I’m writing to update you on my authoring adventure and share some good news. Believe it or not, thanks to The Awkward Detective: The Bone Donor, now available at Amazon.com for ninety-nine cents, I have already met my 2014 financial objective of earning enough royalty income to purchase an AM/FM clock radio.

What can I tell you? Greed is good.

Yesterday, after hours of online shopping I purchased a SONY, model ICFC218.

I went with the ICFC218 because it has big numbers, which I need, for something has happened to my vision in recent years that has limited my perception of detail. In fact, without using my sense of smell, regardless of distance, I would not be able to pick Gisele Bundchen out of a police line-up that included: Peter Lorre, Elmo, a naked cowboy, and Alan Dershowitz.

My parents, god rest their souls, told me to never brag. But, it is difficult given the extent of my success. In 2013, I far exceeded my expectations by earning enough royalty income to purchase a Taco Meal for Five. And now, with almost a half a year to go, I’m  in possession have my precious AM/FM clock radio. Life is good!

If I was ever asked what has led to my astounding success, having written 6 novels in 2 years, I would be tempted to attribute my stardom to hard work, but the truth is it’s all about greed-fueled ambition – the want of material things!

W4$ 2013 Goal: Taco Meal for 5. Status= MET!

W4$ 2013 Goal: Taco Meal for 5. Status= MET!

Having made this admission, my greed is in need of a new target. Thus, the time has come for me to set my 2015 financial goal (or risk never writing another word.)

Selecting my new goal has been a difficult task, but after much thought, I’ve decided upon a theme of self-aggrandizement, a variation of self-promotion, in selecting the next object of my desire.

Originally, I was going to go with a “W4$” ass tattoo.  But I after considerable thought, I abandoned this goal for I feared  the inevitable revelation of this artwork, inch above my furry ass crack, would likely result in the total loss of my fan base.

Consequently, moving forward, I’ve decided to pursue a “W4$” Mr. T Starter Kit, to include: a W4$ diamond studded tooth grill and a gold ganstah necklace anchored by a W4$ logo, containing, at minimum, 1 troy ounce of pure gold.

W4$ 2015 Goal: The Mr. T "I pity the fool" W4$ Starter Kit

W4$ 2015 Goal: The Mr. T “I pity the fool” W4$ Starter Kit

In response to your screams of “Impossible Wright! Don’t do it! Be more realistic!” I counter with the prediction that the second installment in my Awkward Detective series,THE CHIPMUNK FACTOR, due out this Christmas, will be a hit, making my dreams of being the next Lil Wayne+ come true.

Where will all this ambition end? It’s difficult to say. But, last night I had a dream about a pretty blonde-haired lady, a pink Mercedes and a house with an ocean view…
W4$


THE BONE DONOR

TheBoneDonorCover300
My last two books tanked. So, now I’m in danger of missing my 2014 financial goal of earning enough royalty income to purchase an AM/FM clock radio. Accordingly, I felt obliged to publish yet another novel. This one is called THE BONE DONOR.

Unlike my other books, that feature almost incomprehensible plots, THE BONE DONOR is my attempt to reach more readers by writing something a wise-ass teenager could comprehend.

Featuring the dark humor of yours truly, THE BONE DONOR deploys a simple linear plot to tell the story of Jason Mashburn, a twenty something who learns love can be murder when the girl of his dreams falls victim to a rare blood disease…

I’m not sure how to categorize THE BONE DONOR. So, I’m calling it a dark romance/mystery/thriller, which means everybody should love this book, or I’m facing a insurmountable competition. Time will tell 🙂

THE BONE DONOR was specifically written to be read from a beach chair. It contains 42,000 words and is rated PG-13. Only available at Amazon.com

THE AGITATION OF RENNY SNEED

W4$TheAgitationCover400Since I’m a persistent son of a gun, due to the unpopularity of my last novel, the sex comedy, THE GENERAL STORE, I’ve decided to foist another ebook upon my massive fan base. This time it’s YA fiction. The book is called THE AGITATION OF RENNY SNEED.

All my books come to me in a flash. THE AGITATION OF RENNY SNEED was no exception. I was sitting in a high school auditorium, listening to a concert, thinking about the Sandy Hook tragedy, when this book hit me, including its title. In the following days, I wrote THE AGITATION OF RENNY SNEED. I then shelved it because I wasn’t sure it was fit for publication. I was concerned about offending victims of school violence, especially since THE AGITATION OF RENNY SNEED was written for a young adult audience. But, after reading it a couple times, I think the book’s message outweighs its story. Ultimately, I’ll leave it to others to be the judge. I’d allow my teenagers to read it, but I never said I was a great parent…The good news is I’m fairly certain THE AGITATION OF RENNY SNEED is less offensive than my 5-star religious satire, BILLY GRIST, but what isn’t?

This all being said, at this exact moment, I feel my prior publication concerns are misplaced. For in the end, I figure, THE AGITATION OF RENNY SNEED is just a book. Thus, like any book, it can be put down like a rabid dog. No read. No foul.

Hopefully, all this false angst has piqued your interest. If so, read on, for below is the blurb for THE AGITATION OF RENNY SNEED, which has been written to inspire related commerce at Amazon.com. Please note when purchasing THE AGITATION OF RENNY SNEED, all income will go directly to me, an independent author seeking to fulfill his life-long dream of generating enough royalty income to purchase an AM/FM clock radio, and a cranberry leisure suit.

THE AGITATION OF RENNY SNEED

Renny Sneed is trying to survive ninth grade, but the odds are against him. He’s tiny, and he lacks social skills. Plus, he has a squeaky voice, crooked teeth, acne, and a brother who ignores him. Even worse, the Snarp twins, mindless jocks, are bullying Renny, and nobody seems to care. The situation appears to be hopeless, but then the noble son of an Iraq war veteran arrives at school, a Texan named Johnny Goldin. Johnny befriends Renny, and Renny experiences happiness for the first time in his life. But, the good times are cut short by a tragedy.

Alone and scared, Renny turns to the adults in his life, but they don’t sense his desperation. Among the clueless is Renny’s stepdad, Dewey Grint. Dewey is a doomsday prepper who is too worried about the upcoming global apocalypse to help his lost stepson. Depressed, Renny turns to his long-time imaginary friend, and X-box avatar, Sergeant Bark, for help. Ever ready and ultra-confident, the good sergeant assures Renny all his problems can be easily resolved via the liberal application of automatic weaponry. And soon thereafter, the battle begins. After watching SpongeBob, and eating a good breakfast, of course…

From the author of BILLY GRIST, THE AGITATION OF RENNY SNEED is a young adult novella. It contains 25,000 words, slightly less than THE OLD MAN AND THE SEA. It is rated PG-13.

The Walking Man


Loosely based on a true story, The Walking Man is a tale of “persistence, self-discovery, and redemption” that brings new meaning to the term “never give up.” This original and wickedly humorous love story begins when a teenage boy is inexplicably paralyzed. His family tries to care for him, but tragedy ensues causing the young man to be institutionalized. At Leicester County Hospital, a facility dedicated to excellence in everything it does, our hero sheds his bitterness after “winning” a war with his surly roommate. He then finds love when a beautiful volunteer stops by to read to him. Despite their instant connection, paralysis and the “love” of a brute leads to a breakup that forces “the walking man” to devise a plan to win back the woman he loves.
Download The Walking Man today and experience a tale of redemption like no other.

Fiction. 41,000 words.

Price: $0.99 USD

Five Stars:
Largely based on factual experience, this story immediately captivated my interest, regardless of my reservation that the subject matter would have sufficient body. But it certainly does, and the blithe and darkly humorous narrative voice carries the story along amid lovable yet dysfunctional characters – of which there are a fully furnished complement. I never spoil plots, so you’ll have to take my word that this is a book you will surely finish, once hooked after a few chapters. Be prepared to laugh out loud…

@writeintoprint

Five Stars:

I probably see 10-20 “read my book” messages a day from/by indie authors. I ignore them for the most part, because I have so little disposable time. I picked up this book on an impulse and read it. It cost me a day when I should have been writing, but it was worth it. The story is a sort of modern fable, a tale of persistence, self-discovery and redemption. It’s a novella (42,000 words) and I found it easy to read and quite enjoyable. I gave it 5 stars for the quality of the writing and the directness of the story. Part of the story reminded me of “Flowers for Algernon.”

JJ Toner


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